We did a test in the office the other day to find out what bird personality we were. Mine hovered around being a peace loving dove and a flamboyant peacock...
Everyone felt that i was more peacock than a dove due to my outgoing personality.. What they did not know is that the peacock nature was carved out of me during my event days..it wasnt the real me...the real me is like eeyore.. Quiet, passive and blue...recently at work, due to the competition from another peacock, i've turned more into a dove lookalike human being.. In fact, i hate the competition.. I wanted to be a team player and work together...why fight when u are from the same team?
Work has turned into a mundane job for me now.. The project has rolled out but there's only me managing the whole thing. I am trying my best but maybe my best is not enough for the management.. I worked day and night in silence.. On my own.. Something which i have never done in my whole career.. I resented work because of this... I feel upset to go to work, pissed at the sheer amount of work that was on me alone and nobody was offering help...
I contemplated to throw in my letter and get something else.. I'm still hanging in there for the time being.. Until i find something better i guess. I used to enjoy my work there but since the other peacock came, it seems as if i have lost my feathers... Looking more like a timid dove though... Hopefully this period will pass faster and things will get better..
Showing posts with label self reflections. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self reflections. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Long busy week...
It has been a long and busy 2 weeks... with the skin allergy that I had, work has been delayed and I did all I could to clear all the work that has been sitting on top of me when I'm busy scratching...
I spent the last thursday and friday clearing everything... I sat down and quieten myself to work... By Friday night, I cleared almost 90% of my work... I left work at 830pm, happy that I managed to finish majority of my pending work. Despite missing some of the deadlines, I'm still glad I made it by Friday.
I realised that work has been alright for me although I have been upset over certain reporting structures and other nitty gritty... I also realised that in order to survive in any place, you got to tell yourself to stop hearing all the negative things in the office... so and so is leaving, so and so is unhappy, so and so is .... when I started this job, all I cared about was the money and the fact that it allowed me to go home on the dot so that it allows me to do all other things that I wanted to. I didnt know what has changed.. maybe it was the permanent position or the added responsibilities, I get easily swayed by all the negative things that people are saying into my ears...
I learnt my lessons well.. i left a lot of jobs in the previous companies due to such negativity... but i realised when you listen to such things, you tend to forget the main motive of taking up this job... i left events to do an admin job... but yet, giving my past experience in events, i'm tasked with almost all their events... be it good or bad, i'm glad because there is still a small relevance to my passion... my bosses see me as somebody who can do bigger things in the job and i see everything they task me to do as a form of training for the bigger things in life... if i cannot even handle such a tiny thing, how else can i handle a bigger job? So when my neighbours are complaining of overwhelming work, unreasonable bosses and all other sorts, i'm just glad that i have this job that pays the bills, lets me expand my potential and even let me do a little bit of events...
I spent the last thursday and friday clearing everything... I sat down and quieten myself to work... By Friday night, I cleared almost 90% of my work... I left work at 830pm, happy that I managed to finish majority of my pending work. Despite missing some of the deadlines, I'm still glad I made it by Friday.
I realised that work has been alright for me although I have been upset over certain reporting structures and other nitty gritty... I also realised that in order to survive in any place, you got to tell yourself to stop hearing all the negative things in the office... so and so is leaving, so and so is unhappy, so and so is .... when I started this job, all I cared about was the money and the fact that it allowed me to go home on the dot so that it allows me to do all other things that I wanted to. I didnt know what has changed.. maybe it was the permanent position or the added responsibilities, I get easily swayed by all the negative things that people are saying into my ears...
I learnt my lessons well.. i left a lot of jobs in the previous companies due to such negativity... but i realised when you listen to such things, you tend to forget the main motive of taking up this job... i left events to do an admin job... but yet, giving my past experience in events, i'm tasked with almost all their events... be it good or bad, i'm glad because there is still a small relevance to my passion... my bosses see me as somebody who can do bigger things in the job and i see everything they task me to do as a form of training for the bigger things in life... if i cannot even handle such a tiny thing, how else can i handle a bigger job? So when my neighbours are complaining of overwhelming work, unreasonable bosses and all other sorts, i'm just glad that i have this job that pays the bills, lets me expand my potential and even let me do a little bit of events...
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