Weekend...

I slept late last night... really late.. was chatting online with a friend from india till almost 2am... then i updated my blog and decided that i didn't want to sleep yet *STILL!!* and I was waiting for somebody to call... but knowing full well he wouldn't call back, I called Gary instead... chatted for almost 2 hours before i called it quits...

Did I say I met Raymond for dinner and got home at about 1030? Then I got this sms from the flower guy... "Are u sure you do not wish to give us another shot? Flowers are still there for u" *sigh* I spoke to the friend from india and asked for advice... of cos, now my career comes first, i can't say i'm comfortable with the way my relationship is turning out now, but at least i can say i'm learning how to be a good gf... somebody has to give in more than another i guess... so although i feel i am putting in more now, i'm alright with it... as long as he knows, i'm fine... of cos there is also a limit... i wouldn't want to be doing everything for him.. a man has got to do what a man needs to in my belief... ironically, i read an article this morning saying that if ladies were to do everything for the guy, they would feel as if they are useless and it harms the relationship... anyway, i haven't replied him... not that i dun have a decision but i just want it to be a quiet decision which he can accept on his own...

I called gary and didn't say a single word on the phone with him... i just knew he was there and that was enough for me... it was support for me i guess... he went on talking rubbish over the phone, telling me about how Mabel nagged at him the other day for spending a lot of time at work, how his project is delayed bcos of a tiny glitch that happened... i know what he wanted to do... to fill the space or void that i have now... when i finally spoke, i broke down... i was upset at the death of a cat feeder lady sometime this week, worried about the cats, freaked out at the encounter with the spirit of the cat feeder lady one day after she was cremated, stressed at work but kept a bravefront, hated the fact that i couldn't say no to the flower guy to the extent that it hurts him bad enought to back off and i just needed somebody to give me an outlet to break down... he listened to me for the next 45 mins.... just for me to rant everything out... yes, this is how we communicate sometimes... we take turns to talk...

i woke up this morning to find this fella in this sleeping position...

He was happily sleeping on my leg, using it as a pillow.. although i think it is rather hard... but as long as he's happy...

start of the weekend babe... time to spend more time with yourself... who cares if he doesn't call or sms... it's not as if i will die without him around...